The Importance of Keeping Your Word

First things first. Apologies for the delay of this piece of writing.

I hate it when I don’t keep my word.

But it happened, and it is a beautiful opportunity to look at the effects of keeping, or not keeping your word.

For context, this is what happened: I didn’t have content pre-planned (something I am looking into), I came out of the meditation retreat in Greece and felt completely thrown under the bus. So I did not send out the newsletter last week.

And I did not send it out the following Sunday either.

If I had kept my word, I would have sent it.
I haven’t due to various reasons - and this rather small incident really got me thinking about all the times when I did keep, and did not keep my word.

Words are powerful.

And if we act in alignment with them, we send a powerful signal.

To ourselves, and others. We radiate trust, commitment, and a sense of consistency. If we don’t act in alignment with them, we send a powerful signal too. But it is a signal that is hurting ourselves, and in the worst case the people around you. If we don’t keep our word consistently, we start to distrust ourselves, doubt our own reliability, and feel a nagging sense of guilt.

I know this is how I felt - even though it was “just” the newsletter. So last week, I had a very tough conversation with myself. I asked myself what it is that makes me say things and then not do them.

What’s important here - this is not a blame game. We all have a shadow. As described by famous Psychiatrist Carl Jung, it is the unconscious part of our character that does not align with the ideal that we’re aiming for.

This process is about curious, compassionate inquiry. About shining light on the shadow, making enough time to draw out the lesson, and then integrating the learning and embodying it through demonstrating a different behavior the next time.

And then the next time. And the next time. You get the idea.

What you don’t own, owns you.

One takeaway for me, is to practice pro-active communication when I know that I can’t keep my promise for whatever reason.

Another one to remember: in times of overwhelm and in case you find yourself in freeze mode, the most important thing is the step in front of you. Just take that, without expectation of the outcome. When we start to walk, the way appears.

I’m curious what else will emerge in the upcoming days. Want to join the party?
I highly encourage you to have that tough conversation too and see what comes up.

What do you say you do but don’t do?
Where don’t you keep your word right now?
Where do you keep it?

Happy reflecting, and don’t forget.

Be kind to yourself.

-Christian