The power of commitment

Some of you know, some of you don’t: I struggled with commitments for most of my life.

Not because I didn’t want to make them. But because I found it incredibly difficult to follow through.

I was the guy who started 1000 things and never ended them.
I was the guy who wrote down in is journal that he stops drinking coffee and then had 4 the next day.
I was the guy who instead of just doing the thing, talked about and evaluated doing the thing.

Why?

Fear. Getting stuck in “What if”-scenarios. Becoming addicted to analysis - and then ending up in paralysis. Analysis paralysis became a familiar friend. However it is one of those “friends” that I would put into the energy vampire category. We all know these people. Being around them is draining. It’s tiring.

We get stuck in analysis paralysis because it gives us the fake feeling of “safety.” Knowing all the scenarios, meticulously planning all the details. When I look back at the last 34 years of my life, this NEVER worked.

That’s the thing with overthinking and anticipating the future (aka: what will happen if I commit to XYZ): we can never know. We make predictions based on the past and then assume how the future will be.

So, when it comes to committing to something, this would mean saying no to something that is potentially also interesting. FOMO, the fear of missing out, kicks in.

And now we are a bit closer to the root. We can’t commit because, deep down, we’re afraid. It’s fear. We’re scared of losing something, and the potential of what we might “win” is often not interesting enough.

What helped me a lot recently to 10x my ability to make commitments that I actually follow through is this mantra: fear is safe. Let me repeat that again.

FEAR IS SAFE.

I suggest to experiment with that. Sit with it. Close your eyes and say it under the breath. Fear is safe. Fear is safe. Fear is safe. And see for yourself what it brings up. Notice everything that’s arising, without the need to change. Just let it be here, now. Fear is safe. Then, I suggest to make a conscious inhale, and with the exhale “release” the mantra.

Now look at the areas in your life that need a commitment from your side that you have been procrastinating or postponing. One day, when…

Let me share this sentence with you, which really woke me up the first time I read it one year ago: “One day, or day one. You decide.”

What is it that you want to commit to?
Why? And how does that commitment look like in the smallest way? Like: what’s the tiniest observable behaviour that you can demonstrate, to confirm that commitment?

Sometimes it is something big.
Sometimes, it is something small.

Your judgement doesn’t matter. What matters is that you’re clear on your intention, clear on your commitment, and that you don’t allow a deluded experience of fear in your bodymind to hold you back from becoming who you know you are.

I challenge you to identify ONE thing you've been putting off out of fear - big or small. Write it down right now. Then, commit to taking the first tiny step toward it TODAY. Not tomorrow, not next week. Today. Feel the fear and do it anyway. Remember, fear is safe. You've got this.

Love. Christian